- Heat the oil and the butter in a large lidded casserole. Season the chicken, then fry for about 5 minutes on each side until golden brown. Remove and set aside.
- Pour off excess fat, but leave enough to carry flavour.
- In that same pot, add the onion (this might be a better place for stems) and fry about 5 minutes, until soft.
- Add the garlic and cook for another minute, then add the Swiss chard stems, sliced thinly, cooking just as the stems start to soften.
- If the pot feels dry or the fond threatens to catch too hard, loosen it with a splash of wine or broth. Let it reduce slightly; this is where the sauce begins to form.
- Add the lentils and stir them to coat, then add the tomato, paprika, and broth. The liquid should feel sufficient but not excessive — this is not a soup. Bring it to a gentle simmer.
- Add the chicken legs and thighs first, nestled into the lentils. Simmer very gently for about 15 to 20 minutes.
- When the lentils are just starting to soften, add the breasts and cook for about another 15 minutes.
- Check the amount of liquid, if it's too soupy, let it cook uncovered to reduce the liquid. If too dry, add a little broth.
- Fold in the chard leaves and continue to cook slowly for another 2 to 3 minutes.
- Last but not least, add the vinegar and stir through.
- It does well to leave it sit off the heat for a bit; the lentils will thicken slightly and the flavours round out. If it cools too much, just reheat.
The Experimental Mouffette
Tuesday, April 21, 2026
Chicken with Beluga Lentils and Swiss chard - Untested
Sunday, April 19, 2026
Neapolitan-style Pasta with Lentils - Untested
- Put the lentils in a pot with the water, garlic, bay leaf, olive oil, and salt. Bring to a boil, then reduce to a gentle simmer, partially covered. Cook 25–40 minutes if soaked, 45–65 if not. They're done when a lentil crushes completely between two fingers with no graininess. As they near the end, smash a quarter to a third of them against the side of the pot — this thickens the liquid into something that will cling to the pasta rather than pool beneath it. Keep the pot moist, topping up with hot water as needed.
- Start the onions when the lentils are about halfway done. Cook them low and slow in the olive oil with the garlic, adding a tablespoon of water whenever the pan looks dry, until completely soft and translucent — about 20–30 minutes. Add the white wine and let it cook off, another 2–3 minutes. Season with salt. Add the onions to the lentils and stir through.
- Cook the pasta in well-salted water until noticeably underdone — 2–3 minutes short of packet time. Reserve about 200ml (¾ cup) of pasta water before draining.
- Add the drained pasta to the lentils along with the reserved pasta water. Stir well, taste for salt, cover the pot, and turn off the heat. Leave to rest for at least 1 hour — or make it in the morning for the evening. This rest is the technique, not optional.
- To serve, stir in the red wine vinegar, add a small ladleful of water, and reheat gently until warm through. Adjust consistency with more water if needed. Finish each bowl with a thread of olive oil.
Roasted Acorn Squash Cornbread - Untested
- Roast the Squash: Preheat oven to 400°F. Cut acorn squash in half, remove seeds, and roast face down on a baking sheet for 45 minutes or until tender. Scoop out 1 cup of flesh and mash it well or puree it.
- Prepare Oven/Pan: Lower oven temperature to 375°F. Grease a 9x9-inch baking dish or a cast-iron skillet.
- Mix Dry Ingredients: In a large bowl, whisk together the cornmeal, baking powder, and salt.
- Combine Wet Ingredients: In a separate bowl, whisk together the mashed acorn squash, milk, eggs, maple syrup (if using), and melted butter/oil.
- Combine: Pour the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients. Mix until just combined.
- Bake: Pour the batter into the prepared pan. Bake for 30–35 minutes, or until the top is golden and a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.
Wednesday, April 8, 2026
Ooopsie Crackers - Testing
- Mix everything until cohesive. You want a firmer dough than the flatbread — not sticky.
- Allow the dough to rest 20–30 minutes, which helps with rolling.
- Divide into 2–3 pieces and roll each piece very thin, as thin as possible (1–2 mm), almost translucent.
- Prick all over with a fork.
- Optional toppings: flaky salt, sesame seeds, cracked pepper, herbs
- Bake 355°F for 12–18 minutes depending on thickness. Rotate tray halfway to ensure even baking.
- Cool fully - be patient, they crisp up as they cool.
Tangy Skillet Flatbreads (naan-ish) - Test 1
- Sprinkle yeast over your dough, mix well.
- Add 60 g flour first, mix, then add more only if still very loose.
- You’re aiming for a soft, slightly tacky dough, not sticky batter.
- Cover and rest 45–60 minutes. It won’t double — just a bit of puff is enough.
- Turn onto a floured surface.
- Divide into 8–10 pieces (~90–110 g each?).
- To shape, gently flatten and roll thin (3–5 mm).
- Don’t overwork — the dough will be a bit relaxed/fragile.
- In a hot dry pan (cast iron ideal), cook 1–2 min per side until bubbles form, and brown spots appear.
- To finish, brush with butter or oil and sprinkle with salt and or herbs
Cook’s Spread - Untested
- Drain well
- Press out excess liquid—this matters or it’ll be watery.
- Chop or mash
- Rough chop for a coarse texture
- Or mash for something closer to a spread
- Warm gently with fat
- Heat butter or bacon fat, add veg, cook 3–5 minutes
- → this step brings back aroma and richness
- Season + brighten
- Add mustard or vinegar
- Taste → adjust salt/pepper
- Finish
- Stir in herbs if using
- Serve warm or room temp
Sunday, April 5, 2026
Homemade Roots Divino Bianco - Untested
Homemade Roots Divino Bianco (NA Vermouth) A crisp, herbal non-alcoholic white vermouth inspired by ancient Greek herbal remedies — lemon, thyme, rosemary, and a gentle bitterness from wormwood.
Ingredients (makes ~600ml, ~12 servings of 50ml)
- 500ml dealcoholized white wine (dry, neutral — e.g. Leitz or Ariel)
- 100ml water
- 60g sugar
- 30ml fresh lemon juice
- 3 strips lemon zest (no pith)
- 4 sprigs fresh thyme
- 1 sprig fresh rosemary
- 1 tsp dried wormwood (artemisia absinthium)
- ½ tsp dried gentian root
- ½ tsp dried oregano
Method
1. Make the simple syrup. Combine the sugar and water in a small saucepan over medium heat. Stir until the sugar fully dissolves — you'll see the liquid go from slightly cloudy to completely clear (2–4 minutes). Remove from heat and let cool completely before using.
Note: Dissolving sugar in warm water rather than adding it cold ensures even distribution and prevents graininess in the finished vermouth. The syrup must be fully cooled before combining with the wine, or it will slightly cook off the more delicate aromatic compounds.
2. Infuse the botanicals. In a clean glass jar, combine the dealcoholized wine with the lemon zest, thyme, rosemary, wormwood, gentian, and oregano. Seal and leave to infuse at room temperature. Taste every 30 minutes. The infusion is ready when it is pleasantly herbal and lightly bitter — usually 1 to 2 hours. Stop as soon as it tastes right to you; do not push further.
Note: Wormwood (artemisia absinthium) and gentian root are both intensely bitter due to sesquiterpene lactones and iridoid glycosides respectively. These compounds extract quickly in liquid — far faster than, say, vanilla or citrus peel. This is why tasting every 30 minutes is the real instruction here, not the time range.
Note: The lemon zest releases limonene and other aromatic oils from its surface cells almost immediately. The white pith beneath contains naringin, which is harsh and astringent — this is why zest strips with no pith are specified.
3. Strain. Once the flavor is where you want it, pour the infusion through a fine mesh sieve or cheesecloth into a clean bottle or jar. Press the herbs gently to extract the last of the liquid, then discard the solids.
4. Finish and adjust. Stir in the cooled simple syrup and lemon juice. Taste carefully and adjust: more lemon juice if it needs brightness, a little more syrup if the bitterness is too sharp, a splash more wine if it feels too concentrated. The target balance is lightly sweet, gently sour, and pleasantly bitter — none of the three should dominate.
Note: The lemon juice serves two roles here: flavour (brightness, citrus lift) and chemistry. The citric acid lowers the pH slightly, which helps preserve the aromatic compounds and extends shelf life without any alcohol to act as a preservative.
5. Bottle and chill. Pour into a sealed bottle and refrigerate immediately. Ready to use straight away. Keeps for up to 2 weeks — after which the more delicate aromatics begin to fade.
LHSS Score
| Category | Weight | Score | Weighted | Notes |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Greens / Cruciferous / Bitters | 25% | 6 / 10 | 1.50 | Wormwood, rosemary, and thyme are bitter and phytonutrient-rich, but this is a condiment — a 50ml serving delivers only trace amounts of plant material. Scored for the bitter botanical presence, not volume. |
| Alliums | 15% | 0 / 10 | 0.00 | None. |
| Pulses + Fibre | 20% | 0 / 10 | 0.00 | None. This is a flavouring agent, not a fibre source. |
| Fat Quality | 15% | 10 / 10 | 1.50 | Zero fat of any kind. |
| Dairy Density | 10% | 10 / 10 | 1.00 | No dairy. |
| Salt Load | 5% | 10 / 10 | 0.50 | No added salt whatsoever. |
| Spice / Phytonutrients | 10% | 9 / 10 | 0.90 | Thyme, rosemary, oregano, wormwood, gentian, lemon zest — a genuinely rich botanical profile. Wormwood and gentian in particular are among the most potent bitter digestive herbs used historically. |
| LHSS TOTAL | 100% | 5.40 / 10 | Scored honestly as a condiment/aperitif, not a meal component. The score reflects what a 50ml serving actually delivers — trace botanicals, no fibre, no alliums, no pulses. Within its category (flavouring agent / drink base), it is excellent: zero fat, zero dairy, zero salt, and a strong phytonutrient profile. |
LDL note: No meaningful LDL relevance in either direction at a 50ml serving size. The botanical profile — wormwood, gentian, rosemary, thyme — is anti-inflammatory and digestively supportive, which is a mild positive. The sugar content (roughly 5g per 50ml serving) is low and unremarkable. This is a good substitute for an alcoholic aperitif, which would carry far more metabolic cost.